Grad

Tonight was Steffany's grade 6 grad... exciting eh? Anyway so we're sitting there, in a room full of people we've never met.. to listen to the Janet Johnstone school song... and what all the kids want to be in the future. Then they played a 10 minute video, of pictures and clips from throughout the school year. I started to get teary eyed at this point. Thinking about my days in traditional school.

Since I started cyber schooling, I've realized just how much I miss traditional school. Not just any traditional school though, because I hated my 3 months at Scarlett. How much I missed being at Masters. Seeing my friends every day, friends I'd known since 5th grade, going to Circle Square Ranch every september, walking to the park and the icecream shop at lunch, the way things had been for 4 years. Sure I still talk to most of my friends from Masters, and I hang out with a few of them but it's not the same. I still spend hour after hour day in and day out on my computer. Talking to myself, or the few people I know at St. Pauls. Interacting through a computer screen. I miss the face to face.

Then I got thinking about this coming school year, and grad. I want a real graduation with my friends. Sure I'm going to their grad, but I want to walk across the stage with them.. not just sit in the audience then go to the dance. I don't want to go to a grad, with a bunch of people I've never met... never built relationships with. Grad is supposed to be a celebration of high school, and the good times with friends. Not a certificate for sitting behind a computer.

Regardless of how much I want it though.. it doesn't matter. I'm stuck behind the computer screen for another year.

*Just a useless rant really... but it's a blog*

Scary Stuff

Alright this isn't going to make any sense at all but I totally have to rant about it cause it is scaring the crap out of me.

This guy added me on msn a few weeks ago right? Alright well I hadn't heard anything from him for a while. Tonight he got a webcam, so suddenly he decided to talk to me. In the hopes of getting naked pictures.. I am so not joking.

Anyway I refused, so he hacked into my msn again, once in my account, he found out my address, postal code, and any other account registered through that e-mail. So he hacked into 3/4 of my internet accounts, and deleted them. If any of you can't get into your hotmail accounts... he was threatening to go into my contact list. I am extremelly sorry!

Anyway so this guy was really freaking me out, so around 1:30 my dad came down and started talking to him on the new account I made (while the guy was on my justduckie account). Threatening him, with tracing his IP and ISP and Proxy and getting authorities involved. Nothing scared this guy away! With my dad talking to him, he was still asking for nude pics of me, telling my dad that if he got a nude pic of me, he'd restore all my accounts. Obviously we refused to bend.

So now I have accounts gone all over the place, and I can only be contacted by phone because any account I create he finds. My dad is going to trace a bunch of his stuff tomorrow, and I saved the conversations. We are going to get the authorities involved, especially because he knows where I live!

So please pray that this gets resolved, that nothing really serious happens, and that this works out in our favor!

*Just goes to prove my other blog I guess. Honestly, as soon as I refused sexually explicit pics, this guy turned really creepy!!*

Boys

Is it just me, or teenage guys retarded? I'm tired of being judged based on my height, weight, bra size, or whether or not I will put out. What happened to old school love? To being with someone for who they are, enjoying their company, wanting to be with them day and night? Have we become so wrapped up in the physical that we've forgotten the emotional?

There's so much pressure on teenagers to have sex, that everything we do revolves around sex. You turn on the tv, and there's a half naked woman to advertise toothpaste, turn on the radio, and you hear a couples steamy relationship to advertise condoms, you walk down the street and there are 14 year old girls in tube tops and barely-there skirts. What have we become?

After being with a guy like that for nearly two years, it is such a relief to have a relationship with someone where it's all emotional. We're teenagers, yes hormones are racing... but there is a such thing as self control. I love the little things with my guy, and there's days where I'm content just cuddeling, and sneaking in the odd kiss. How can you have a relationship based on the physical? It never works.

There are a few guys out there who don't think that way, and girls who are accepted although they don't look as if they stepped out of playboy. Kudos to you! We need more people like that in society.